At 35000 feet above the ground.....

When ever I go to Paris or Spain, I like to go on an Aeroplane,
I’ve been a few time and now I know, How they turn the propellers and off we go…

I don’t recall whose lines these are (certainly not mine), but it did capture the joy and excitement almost everyone has to travel by air. Why not… it still is an elusive experience, not everyone gets to do it on a regular basis. It is also the closest you can come to space travel. I mean even the cabbies look at you differently if you carry a bag and say Airport vis-à-vis Dadar- Pune Volvo stand.

Over a 100 years old, but this mode of travel still holds a lot of curiosity in itself. It begins right from is the flight on time? Is my seat an Isle or Window? Is my baggage within limits? Is the aircraft a Boeing, Airbus, a DC or Tristar? Do we get an aerobridge or it will be the airport bus and ladder? Did we push back on time? Which of the Hostess is gonna be serving me? Damn…. Too many variants…But that’s a part of the excitement I guess.

So what do I like once airborne- well there are too many things to choose from; the animated safety routines, the food on the tray, the views through the window, the In-flight entertainment…. Too far routine.

Arguably, the most delightful place in a plane is the compact lavatory. I say they are simply amazing. That dingy 6’ x 4’ cabin can provide what I say is divine- pure relief at 35000 feet. You cannot imagine a moment of privacy in your own office or home at times, but this one does offer it. Besides, it is designed to please you in every way. That small space has virtually everything you can ask for.

Close the door and turn the knob to lock the doors and… Surprise!!! The lights on the mirrors come on and just brighten up your day. The fellow passengers are usually in their best behaviour (unless they had a few extra pegs) - so you do not end up with the public utility feel. Now the best part is, there is a specific disposal bin assigned to every probable waste- which kind of baffles me.

Now I can understand disposals with markings that read ‘Toilet paper’, ‘Soiled diapers’- but what about ‘Razor blade’??? Now there is no way you can carry a razor inside the cabin of an aircraft. I mean people are so skeptic these days that International airport check in has a showcase of objects not permitted aboard an aircraft with a warning at the bottom reading “For display purpose only”- how do I get a razor in there???

Now I’m sure someone has already thought of the counter argument that airlines offer a shaving kit- yes I know, but not in the Economy Class. That is a facility for the Business Class or First Class passengers. And those are good quality razors… I mean who goes around like- swipe- swipe- swipe; throw it now, its worn….. No one chucks a razor off after one use. I mean that seems to be designed expecting a werewolf.

What makes those units so clean is the flush in the water closets. They seem to like suck all the bad stuff away- along with those amazing sci- fi sounds. I actually am yet to see how that is actually taken off the plane- which I will update the day I do find out…